i think im terrible at juggling balance into my life.

things i had,
people i once knew,
those who were once played important roles in my life,
are now gone.
like poof gone.

i miss them, really really miss them. i feel so remorseful that i've said those terrible things to them before. but the nails've been driven in; taking them out will still leave holes. this one is probably worst wrong turn i've ever made in my life. never before had i felt so alone and so outcasted. sure enough, i've had a new character casted into my world, but i've lost much much more. losing the latter is definitely not the price i paid to bring in the former; i've just played my hand bad, so how to i recoup my losses?

i dont know how to face these people anymore, maybe they've just forgotten about me, deemed me as someone not worth they're time; i want to be involved again, for they are my memories of my youth. they are the ones who i should have chosen at that point in time, but i fucked it up over and under.

someone tell me, what should i do?


waihong, lost.