The Friend Ship.

as once again, i wonder to myself: how much of a friend have i been to those around me?

friendship requires neither feedback nor affirmation. it is a path were individuals, like you and me, walk on. subconsciously i met you, and you met me, and we all just got along together. time nurtures our bonds and constant co-inhibition breeds familiarity. by the time we realised we were friends, we're so comfortable being around each other, nothing else really seemed to matter.

there's no quota to meet to continue being friends, only rules that were silently agreed upon, boundaries that must not be crossed. but self-aware and perhaps self-conscious, between you and me, how far can our friendship sail?

asides from bonds that already made, new ones are always waiting to be forged. time and time, with every new friend i meet, i hoped so dearly that i can find someone like-minded, someone like me. not simply a personality clone, but someone who shares views and passion.

there already are people whom i deemed as brothers i never had, hence i'm looking even deeper. a soulmate perhaps. someone who can find me when i'm lost, fish me out of the murky darkness and nurse me back on track. someone who i want to tell my deepest, darkest shames to and still be able to joke freely with.

back to reality, i'm not complaining about what i already have. its the hunger for acceptance that drives me to want more. but then again, friendship transcends words and languages, perhaps its time i learn to look deeper into myself.


The Relation Ship.

ever since the huge mess since last november/december, i must say that i have grown quite a bit in the emotional department. leveled-up perhaps. but even so, i've only ever had ONE relationship that could even be called so. even so, why do some people still come to me for advice? shouldn't one approach the more experienced peers to tackle their problems? all i can offer is my foolishness along with some recklessness topped with beautiful words.

i chid myself for only finally stepping out of my past recently. and then to find that i have to enlist in june. romance, for me, is ever so elusive. perhaps its due to my own tardiness that i do not seize my chances. june draws nearer so hauntingly, and no man has ever escaped time. but my silver lining is there. i'm hopeful, albeit naive.

for someone who speaks like he knows alot, i'm what most of you might call: a noob. that i agree. having made a big mess and fallen out of a heck long of a fiasco has made me rust. the first impression only lasts so long before she starts to realise your true side. your weak side. but even so, i believe being a romanticist will aid me in my relationship. words can play the mind, and as a certain saying goes: seduce her mind, and her body is yours. sounds preverse, but i meant it with context to romance, and not just sex.

i am a touchy lover if any should ask. i probably go by two main love languages: touch and words. touch is real; words are seductive. i like to be seduced. (:

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ok, enough of ships.

not trying to be a prick, but i do like having confidantes (note: confidantes are females; confidants are male.). i'd like to understand how girls/women think. guys are just guys, and thats all we are.

i want to be close enough to you for you to depend on. 
i want you to know i will listen if you pour your heart;  
i will care.

vent your frustrations, 
voice out your vilest thoughts. 
i don't want you to feel that you are all alone.

let down your guard,
let me into your mind.
we'll trade secrets;
we'll share thoughts.

i just want you to know, that i care.

sometimes i wonder if this count as a poem? well either way, this is how a romanticist thinks (:


Waihong, out.